The Summer I Turned Pretty

Summer feels serene, filled with pocketing seashells and salty air. Sunrises and sunsets seem infinite while a child’s laugh echoes as he licks the ice cream dripping onto his arm.

When I feel like I’ll never find love again, I transport to Cousins Beach in The Summer I Turned Pretty. The Conklin and Fisher family create the perfect summer escape. A beach house sits in a small town that lets them desert the monotony and big city life for three fleeting months. If only life could consist of bonfires and banana splits year-round. People idolize summer for new loves budding through the sand and waves steering your heart to peace and clarity, but in The Summer I Turned Pretty a storm always brews in someone’s heart.

The series feels relatable as I see much of myself in the three main characters: Isabel Conklin “Belly,” the Fisher brothers Conrad and Jeremiah, and even Taylor. In their teen years, hormones and impulsive decisions drive them. At the center of it, Belly feels conflicted about which brother she loves more, Conrad or Jeremiah. Her decision to become romantically involved with both brothers (on separate occasions) creates tension in their family dynamic. Even when she engages to Jeremiah, she can’t deny that Conrad stays the center of her universe.

At her bachelorette party, she goes into the bathroom for “a moment to breathe.” She leans on the bathroom sink for stability while she flashes back to Conrad at every stage of their relationship, even before they became exclusive. The pre-wedding jitters intensify, but she realizes she’s not marrying Conrad, who she believes is the love of her life. His kind green eyes and infectious smile feel too familiar for her to leave in the past. She considers that marrying Jeremiah may not be the right decision because her heart has always belonged to Conrad.

For three seasons, Belly plays mental volleyball choosing between Jeremiah and Conrad. While she may genuinely love both boys, she seems unaware that she’s caught in a boy-frenzy cycle. She puts the Fishers on a pedestal that neither of them can live up to. She likes the idea of being with them. Yet obstacles always lead Belly to unsustainable relationships with either boy. Like many young women, Belly makes a man the main priority when she should prioritize herself. This feels like a downfall but really marks her hero’s journey. Belly continuously tries to prove that her love for them will save her until problems arise and reality jolts her awake. She must understand that losing the Fishers would be greater than sacrificing herself. So why does Belly hold onto the false hope that love from other people can make her happier than she can make herself?

Belly receives validation from the Fisher boys, and that affirmation is all a teenage girl needs to forget that love starts and ends with herself. Both boys give her different kinds of validation. Conrad represents her fantasy and soulmate connection. He gives her an infinity necklace and rescues her when she’s intoxicated. Yet his unstable emotions push her to seek acceptance in another man whose walls are too easy to break down, Jeremiah Fisher.

This makes me ask: when someone shows us their idea of love, why isn’t that enough for us? Why do we push until we receive the love that we want, even though someone may never be capable of giving it?

Control begins when we persuade ourselves that someone else’s responsibility is our own. Our lover’s absence in making us feel heard, desired, and loved pushes us into decisions that cause the downfall of the relationship. If you tell someone how you feel and they choose to change their behavior, the emptiness lingers in every word you say. In trying to mold someone into who you want them to be, you eventually forget who you are.

Belly surrenders to the Fishers, yet they repeatedly show their lack of commitment. Until she learns that love starts from within, she will always seek validation in Jeremiah or Conrad Fisher.